With the pending return of "Big Brother" to the small screen (June 25 at 8 p.m. ET on Global in Canada, CBS in the U.S.), we're gearing up for drama and tears (of course).
What we're not ready for are the godforsaken cliches -- especially those phrases that we hear over and over and over again, no matter what reality show you're watching. "Survivor," "Big Brother," "The Amazing Race," "The Celebrity Apprentice," "Hell's Kitchen," hell, even shows like "America's Next Top Model" and "RuPaul's Drag Race" have featured the insufferable reality show repetition.
Take heed, "reality" show writers -- time to spice things up! We never want to hear these overused reality show phrases again:
"He/she threw me under the bus!"
Usually that's not what happens at all. But OK, sometimes it is.
![]()
"I am the ultimate [reality show title] fan."
Shut up.
![]()
"I didn't come here to make friends!"
WE KNOW.
![]()
"Nothing bad is going to happen. I can't lose."
... And then it does happen.
![]()
Sometimes things get way harsh.
![]()
"It's nothing personal."
But it usually is.
![]()
Actually, it always is.
![]()
And then there's NeNe.
![]()
"It's just a game."
Until it's you getting nailed in the face with something.
![]()
"We'll be friends after the show is over!"
Uh huh. Sure.
![]()
"He/she got backdoored/blindsided!"
No, they were eliminated. Plain and simple. Not every vote-out is a backdoor.
![]()
"You're like my family."
Except when they all hate you ... wait, maybe they are like your family!
![]()
![]()
"Final four!"
There's always one looking out for themselves.
![]()
"Final three!"
Better make sure you're in sync before you commit.
![]()
"Final two!"
It always hurts so much more when you're that close to winning.
![]()
"I swear to you I'm telling the truth."
Seriously, though, you're not. And then:
![]()
"I've changed the game for good!"
When you make the dumbest move ever, that doesn't count.
![]()
"People will remember me forever!"
In some cases, this is true.
![]()
"Showmance"
Rid our vernacular of this term!
![]()
"That plan makes total sense!"
Sometimes a necessary lie.
![]()
![]()
![]()
The stare
You know what we mean. Each stare is worth at least 1000 words.
![]()
![]()
![]()
What we're not ready for are the godforsaken cliches -- especially those phrases that we hear over and over and over again, no matter what reality show you're watching. "Survivor," "Big Brother," "The Amazing Race," "The Celebrity Apprentice," "Hell's Kitchen," hell, even shows like "America's Next Top Model" and "RuPaul's Drag Race" have featured the insufferable reality show repetition.
Take heed, "reality" show writers -- time to spice things up! We never want to hear these overused reality show phrases again:
"He/she threw me under the bus!"
Usually that's not what happens at all. But OK, sometimes it is.
"I am the ultimate [reality show title] fan."
Shut up.
"I didn't come here to make friends!"
WE KNOW.
"Nothing bad is going to happen. I can't lose."
... And then it does happen.
Sometimes things get way harsh.
"It's nothing personal."
But it usually is.
Actually, it always is.
And then there's NeNe.
"It's just a game."
Until it's you getting nailed in the face with something.
"We'll be friends after the show is over!"
Uh huh. Sure.
"He/she got backdoored/blindsided!"
No, they were eliminated. Plain and simple. Not every vote-out is a backdoor.
"You're like my family."
Except when they all hate you ... wait, maybe they are like your family!
"Final four!"
There's always one looking out for themselves.
"Final three!"
Better make sure you're in sync before you commit.
"Final two!"
It always hurts so much more when you're that close to winning.
"I swear to you I'm telling the truth."
Seriously, though, you're not. And then:
"I've changed the game for good!"
When you make the dumbest move ever, that doesn't count.
"People will remember me forever!"
In some cases, this is true.
"Showmance"
Rid our vernacular of this term!
"That plan makes total sense!"
Sometimes a necessary lie.
The stare
You know what we mean. Each stare is worth at least 1000 words.
